Brain Germs My Arse!

My opening statement in this entry is, "I fucking hate living in murtahurms, honest I do. On me muvvas eyes!" Therefore, I am writing to dispute the fact that I have brain germs! I would just like to say that I have never had difficulty parking a car in my life, and I proved this to Bomber last week when I reversed my vehicle a good 500m into my space. Alright Bomber, so I nearly lost my mirror and destroyed the hedge to my right, and I parked too close to the car on my left and you couldn't get your beer muscle out of the vehicle.

Perhaps you should take a leaf out of Tim's book by going to the gym, losing a stone and looking damn fabulous to boot - take note fat boy!

Now I know everyone's Gaydar is going off but you cannot accuse any of us of being Heemersexers, Swing-bys or Beslians, well, perhaps you can call all the lads Beslians. I believe that we all still love Blandine. "Tim, have you asked her yet?"

Lads, I would love to go to France with you; honest I would, but with the credit crunch biting into my millions and with the fat boy in the Red suit just around the corner (not Bomber), I feel that I would become subjected to a gargantuan heap of shit if I left our wonderful shores for anywhere other than Dubai, Majorca or some other fabulously hot place. So I must decline this fabulous offer.

I do however, want to be reminded of the Suoz cricket match (I'll watch - Jock's can't play for toffee) and the Munich beerfest; plus any other fabulous events that the magnificent 7 (spelt correctly) are planning in the future.

So before I sign off I suggest that everyone attached to this blog continues to add entries, now and then. It is building into something that will far exceed the size of all J R R Tolkien's works and J K Rowlings' works combined.

SO GET BLOGGING - YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE - AND WE WILL TEXT YOU CONTINUALLY AND SEND YOU LOTS OF SPAM EMAILS IF YOU DON'T!

This is BigJock signing off - BE FABULOUS!